all that hooha.

Shit.


I underperformed today. Underperform. Yeah.


Lit lesson.
Hm. nothin' much to underperform for, but I didn't hand in the list of lit groups to mrs. sushilla. The hell. I used to like responsibility, y'know, but not anymore.


I'm lookin' forward to acting in the play, a-nyway. I'm tentatively witch one. So I'll have to put on a cute witchy voice.


Sweet.


PE.
We had napfa training today.
16 pullups, 9 less than last year.
53 sit ups, same as last year.
We didn't try sit and reach.
We didn't try the shuttle run.
We didn't try 2.4
Oh, and bite this: Standing broad jump.


I did 1.78m.
heck. I know, you're thinking how a girl who's been getting Cs all along for standing broad jump could whoosh up so high. So far.


I'll tell you how.


I don't know.


Seriously. I was concentrating real hard, on my toes, swing your arms, swing your arms, swing. And the momentum was there and I whisked off to a pretty 1.78m.


I don't know how I did it.


But other than that, I underperformed for the rest.


Maths was fine, soh didn't come.
MEP was... okay. But I have a cut on my finger where calista accidentally cut me with the sharp blade of my scissors. Not deep.


Shall I say that for hockey, I underperformed, majorly. Can't hit, can't sweep, can't push, can't tackle, can't defend.


I think I shall remain a midfielder, or defender. Being a forward confuses me. I never know where to stand.


And I was wholly exhausted. I attribute this to... err... I skipped recess. I didn't have lunch after school. All I ate was the floss bun thingy in the morning, and five potato wedges.


Shut up, I'm not on a diet, am not anorexic, am not concerned about calories and all that shite.
there're just times I don't feel hungry, and thus decide not to eat.


And the exhaustion I felt during trng might've been also due to my lack of sleep the night before. and of course the lack of food.


Late nights and pseudo-starvation are detrimental to my performance in sports.


It's been Chrysanthemum today.
green tea in the morning for a caffeine booast. Chrysanthemum for recess. Chrysanthemum after school. Chrysanthemum after hockey.


--


Ever realized, our whole lives revolve around school and work?


I've said this before to some of my classmates, but no one took me seriously. Or maybe no one heard me.


kindergarten,
primary school,
secondary school,
ite/jc,
university. LA BIG ONE.
and then we get shipped off to work.


from then on, it's work work work work work work work.


retirement.


we rest.


we die.


It's so mechanical It's like a rough draft of our lives has already been made for us before we were even born.


School. It's not supposed to be that important. It's just supposed to be a place we go to learn stuff. And we're expected to give up our leisure time staying back. Got piano class? Oh, I don't care, you still have to come for remedial. I don't care!


We give up so much for school and most of us end up forgetting most of what we've learnt anyway.


Yeah, this is what the government is advocating.


this is what society expects of us.


one wrong move and PSHA goodbye to your future. people immediately see you as a potential gangsta, looter, drug addict, whatever.


Society is so. close. minded. so. dependant. on. stereotypes.


PEOPLE JUST SHUT THE FUCK UP AND LOOK AROUND YOU NOT EVERYONE WILL BE HAPPY LIVING YOUR KIND OF FUCKED UP SQUEAKY CLEAN LIVES. live a little.


LaSalle? What the heck? What's so important about art, you nincompoop, must study! Must study! Must go RI and work your ass off! That's considered good okay!


Mum, I want to become a photographer when I grow up.
Mm, that's the sort of thing you should do as a hobby.
Oh. Okay.


We have cca four times a week!
What! that's so bad for your studies lah. Sure cannot go into jc one.
man. i'd better quit lorh. better join something like library club. haiz.
yar lorh.


Okay. I've cooled down now.
just that it seems ridiculous that school and work make up the axis of life.


because they do not.
at least not for me.


hmm. Cheryl, I might just become a librarian at the National library one day.
All I need to know is my alphabet.
The rest is pure bliss.


-


Joanne gave a 'team talk' today. How we should buck up, play harder, cooperate more.
I think it was pretty brave of her to just go up there and talk.
as compared to my meek mousy self, that is. well. yeah.


Denise suggested that we should cooperate more with the sec1s, because we'll have to work with them anyway, but she was openly dissed by some people.


and i realize the abundance of hypocrites in the vicinity.
team unity?
bah. Let's, like, start listening to each other for a change.
and then we'll talk about team unity.


-